i am always constantly at war with myself...

i don't know why myself..

guess this is what happens when you turn 16 at Malaysian, huh?

full of ups and downs...

never a time where you wont stop thinking : Are they still my friends tomorrow?

Typical Malaysian thinking, it's so bad that i wanna laugh at myself 

anyways i will start posting whatever i had experienced starting today, enjoy reading and try not to make the mistakes that i have made in my year.. :)

9th October 2013

midnight, 2:13am...

watching a video on my laptop..

it had ended. decided to sleep actually, since it was getting late...

but as usual "these" problems always come crossing my mind...

saying : i wanna talk to somebody...

annoying like literally... and as usual...

i took a look at my twitter account.. then it was my facebook account...

i wasn't looking for my friends actually...

 cause all i was paying attention to was looking at other people's posts.. and their lively comments...

i have always envied others, having more friends than me, have things in common with their pals or even thinking that they and their friends communicate more than i can communicate with mine...

its always a painful feeling...

but i also had a second thought...

aren't my friends now enough ? aren't they my friends? why do i always keep asking more than i can chew?

optimistic question continuously popping in my mind...

then i had war between the two feelings...

my facial expression was smiling whilst my heart was taking the beating...

like always, whenever a problem comes up

"he" is the one i'm always constantly looking for ...

"he" is my best friend, my best pal and my best bro despite he is younger than me by a month 

i am always glad that he is constantly by my side...

then there is "she", a girl i met this year...

whom i never bothered to talk too...

girly, easily angered, don't know how to communicate with people therefore resulting to punching..

but she is a good friend...

i know that she is the kind to constantly watching out for others...

always caring whenever see knows about her friends problems...

"she" is my friend, my senior(?), my something-in-common-friend

i maybe living in a pits of being despair and always wanna run away from them, 

i have my friends to stop me from running away..

to stick by me and face my problems 

i thank god, that i was able to meet not just these two, but all my friends, my comrades that i have met and made friends with...

thanks for walking down this road with me :)